Get Your Kids Off Welfare

That headline above comes from a Dave Ramsey seminar where he referred to giving kids an allowance is like having them on welfare (giving them something for doing nothing).

We’ve implemented Dave’s Commission System (with some of our own tweaks) and it seems work.

Here’s what we do (it may or may not work for you).

1. Each week we print off the chore list and post it on the fridge. (Here is a link to our Chores Template)

MON
TUE
WED
THUR
FRI
Clean Room Clear Table Clean Room Clear Table Clean Room
$1.00 $1.00 $1.00 $1.00 $1.00
Cat Litter Cat Litter Cat Litter Cat Litter Cat Litter
$.50 $.50 $.50 $.50 $.50

2. Each chore is worth a dollar amount, some are worth more than others.
3. If the child does the chore they earn that amount, if they don’t, they don’t.

Fairly simple, huh? We’ve come across a few problems with this system and added some tweaks.

Child doesn’t do certain chores.

  • We added BONUS CHORE – Sounds cool, right? The bonus chore works like this:
    • We take the grid and cut out all the chores (done or not done) and place them in a hat. Child then draws a chore.
      • If they DID the chore that week they can either:
        1. Take a set dollar amount OR
        2. Roll a dice and get less than the set dollar or double it. (most times they roll the dice)
      • If they DIDN’T do the chore that week their pay isn’t affected at all. It’s a BONUS afterall.

Child doesn’t do chores at all.

  • Limit TV, computer, or something else to completed chores.
  • We don’t allow the child to get on TV or computer until chores are done. They don’t have to do the chores, but they also don’t get the privilege of going on computer or TV.

Is this a perfect system? No. But, it works for us. Will it work for you? Only you can answer that.


Parenting Skills Learned From the Bowling Alley

The other night was ‘date night’ with the wife.

Rarrrr!

Yeah.

We ended up at the local bowling alley.

About 4 lanes down from us there was a group of people that many would refer to as, well, rednecks.

Tanks tops. Tattoos. Patchy looking facial hair. Budweiser.

These folks had a bunch of kids with them, probably 7 – 10 years of age.

And the kids were bowling with the parents. And they were having a blast.

Parents and the kids.

Sure they were loud, obnoxious, liquored up a bit, but everyone was there having fun.

Together.

Contrast that with the scene the following night at our local YMCA.

Organized basketball was going on in the gym.

Inside the gym it was filled with kids, probably 7 – 10 years of age.

Outside the gym it was filled with the parents. All of them on their cell phones.

Texting.

Talking.

Surfing the web.

Point is they were with their kids, but they weren’t with their kids.

I don’t know, maybe you’re like ’so what? get to the point already!’.

My point is maybe we can learn a lesson from the bowling alley parents.

Growing up I played quite a bit of organized sports. I was decent. No Uncle Rico. But then again, who is?

And you know what? The memories I have today aren’t of baseball practice.

Or basketball practice.

They are of my family out on the boat.

Together.

Family camping trips.

Together.

Family doing nothing.

Nothing…together.


The Real Truth About Bad Decisions

This is my best attempt at illustrating something from Francis Chan’s sermon “The Lord’s Prayer.”

He talked about decision making and gave this illustration from one of the men in his church. I’ve added my own flavor to it.

This is what the typical decision making graph looks like:

decision making The Real Truth About Bad Decisions

The one flaw in that graph is that it assumes it’s equally as easy to make a good decision as it is a bad one.

In reality here’s what most decision graphs look like:

decision making reality The Real Truth About Bad Decisions

And then when we make the bad decision (cause it’s easier to slide down a hill than it is to climb stairs) we realize it and take a look at the path back to the good decision.

decision making turning back The Real Truth About Bad Decisions

We not only have to stop the momentum of our bad decision but we have to climb back up the slide and still go through the hard work of climbing the steps up.

Hmmmm, make sense?