Saying Goodbye to Frank

February 16, 2010 By Mike 2 Comments

The call came at 11:00AM on Tuesday. “Hey man, not good news…” My heart dropped. “Frank’s body is full of cancer. It’s not good.” “How long does he have?” I asked. “A couple days…” Tears filled my eyes and I didn’t care.

We got Franklin the week after our honeymoon so he’s always been part of the Ruman house. As Lisa says “He’s is our first baby boy.”

Frank has had his brushes with death.

When Frank was a puppy we kept him in our bathroom at night (if we let run loose he would have torn the house apart, we know, we learned the hard way).

One morning I went to let Frank out. When I opened the door I saw the floor, covered in Tylenol pills. The dang dog had gotten into the medicine cabinet and got into our (Sam’s Club size) Tylenol bottle. We thought we were going to have a dead dog that day. But, a little gas was all that came from that.

We have a ton of memories with Frank. Taking him swimming at the cottage, hiking, driving, playing with the kids. Thankfully we take a lot of pictures, and a lot of videos.

Here’s one recent memory.

http://www.vimeo.com/9424112

Franklin didn’t last a couple more days. We knew that night that we was fading away. He crawled into bed with us about 3AM and laid his head on my stomach. I didn’t sleep that night knowing what the morning had in mind for us.

The ride to the vet was rough. Franklin loved going for rides. He would bounce around like a kangaroo whenever the word was mentioned. Little did Frank know he wouldn’t be returning with us after that ride.

Saying goodbye sucks. I mean it really sucks. Frank was only 7 years old.

I didn’t want to leave the vet that day. And even after we did leave I wanted to sneak back in and kidnap Frank and take him hiking. But, I know what was best for him. He needed to be relieved of the pain his body was it.

Is Frank in heaven? I think he is. I think God knows how much some of the animals he made mean to us and wants us to be happy. Is that biblical? No, but, it’s what helps get though the pain.

I see Frank running though fields, peeing on every bush he meets. I see him playing with other dogs going on adventures together. And every once in a while I see him stop and listen for ‘ride!’ as he goes in circles to jump in the car with us.

Goodbye Franklin. You are missed.

Filed Under General, Parenting

A Question To Ponder: A Life Lived With Faith

February 5, 2010 By Mike Leave a Comment

In the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan his college professor asked him “Is there anything you are doing in your life, right now, that truly requires faith?” And Francis was a bit stumped. And so was I.

After reading that question I set the book down and reviewed my life and I admit the answer was “no, or I don’t think”.

I mean there are a lot of things that I rely on God for but I’m not sure if there was anything I actually said “I can’t do this on my own and need your help Lord.”

And I don’t want this to seem like I don’t rely on God for anything. I know he leads my life but I was just stumped trying to figure this question out. It may help if you understood how I interpreted the question. “Mike, is there anything in your life your doing that you couldn’t do on your own?”

I don’t know.

In 2009 Lisa and I stepped out and did something that required faith. And I’ll be honest it has been rough, real rough. In those valleys we’ve been going through are when we surrender (or need to surrender) it to God. Easier said than done, right?

I struggle with that. With the “surrender” part. I like to call the shots, but I’m realizing there are certain things that I just need to trust in God on, and that scares me.

A popular quoted Bible verse is John 16:33. We love to quote the part “In this world you will have trouble.” But sometimes we forget to add the next sentence “But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

And I read the “take heart” as “fear not”.

I know there are going to be more rough patches ahead. How rough? I don’t know. But, I’m relying on God for those. So, Lord, please help me recognize when I need you and help me surrender my life over to you.

So, your turn, is there anything in YOUR life that requires faith?

Filed Under Books, Faith, Parenting

Get Your Kids Off Welfare

January 26, 2010 By Mike 1 Comment

That headline above comes from a Dave Ramsey seminar where he referred to giving kids an allowance is like having them on welfare (giving them something for doing nothing).

We’ve implemented Dave’s Commission System (with some of our own tweaks) and it seems work.

Here’s what we do (it may or may not work for you).

1. Each week we print off the chore list and post it on the fridge. (Here is a link to our Chores Template)

MON
 TUE
 WED
 THUR
 FRI
Clean Room Clear Table Clean Room Clear Table Clean Room
$1.00 $1.00 $1.00 $1.00 $1.00
Cat Litter Cat Litter Cat Litter Cat Litter Cat Litter
$.50 $.50 $.50 $.50 $.50

2. Each chore is worth a dollar amount, some are worth more than others.
3. If the child does the chore they earn that amount, if they don’t, they don’t.

Fairly simple, huh? We’ve come across a few problems with this system and added some tweaks.

Child doesn’t do certain chores.

  • We added BONUS CHORE – Sounds cool, right? The bonus chore works like this:
    • We take the grid and cut out all the chores (done or not done) and place them in a hat. Child then draws a chore.
      • If they DID the chore that week they can either:
        1. Take a set dollar amount OR
        2. Roll a dice and get less than the set dollar or double it. (most times they roll the dice)
      • If they DIDN’T do the chore that week their pay isn’t affected at all. It’s a BONUS afterall.

Child doesn’t do chores at all.

  • Limit TV, computer, or something else to completed chores.
  • We don’t allow the child to get on TV or computer until chores are done. They don’t have to do the chores, but they also don’t get the privilege of going on computer or TV.

Is this a perfect system? No. But, it works for us. Will it work for you? Only you can answer that.

Filed Under Parenting, Resources

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