This was not what I expected. Eh, not what I wanted. But, it is.

As I sit here writing this blog one of the babies is sleeping next to me. He’s smiling in his sleep. And farting…in his sleep. How do you NOT love a kid that does that?

I can’t keep thinking about the rough life these two babies are headed for. They will not grow up with a lot of money (hell, they’ll more than likely be on welfare most their life) and probably won’t grow up in a church. I don’t know if they’ll get to even hear of their Creator. Their real Father. And my heart is broken.

I look at their innocent faces and weep. I weep for their eternal future and I pray for them. The odds are stacked against them…big time. But I serve a powerful God and I’m not counting these two out for an eternal glory.

What these babies have done for me is renewed my motivation for evangelism. I need to speak with people more about who God is and why I serve Him. And I need to do this with people that are not in my comfort zone. People who have had their children taken away. People who aren’t what most would describe as good parents, good people. People who NEED Jesus.

I’ve been preparing for this time for a while now, waiting on God to speak (verbally) about what he wants me to say. I haven’t heard anything (verbally) yet, but I have grown closer to Him with my prep time.

When you know you’re going to be giving a message to 60-70 incarcerated teens you know you need to be prepared for anything. So that’s what I’ve been studying, everything. This has led me down some pretty crazy paths, and some pretty crazy books (future blog post to come).

I’ve put together the outline and I’ll be giving my testimony (briefly) and then talking about God. I figure when you talk about God that keeps things interesting. We shall see.

And speaking of preaching here’s a snippet from one of my favorite sermons by Louie Giglio.

When I tell people I do foster care many of them say “I’d love to do that, but I couldn’t deal with letting a child go.” I’ll tell ya, me either. It was hard to say goodbye to such a great kid. She had been with us for nearly a year and was part of the family. But, she has her own family, and she’s where she belongs.

One of the coolest moments about saying goodbye was when her Mom gave my wife a hug and said “thank you”. That doesn’t happen a lot in foster care and it was pretty cool to see and was , well, gratifying.

During our foster care support group one of the new foster parents said “how do you let a child go that’s been with you for a long time.” A veteran foster parent (I believe she’s had 65+ kids come and go in her home) said “you grieve…and then you pray that God prepares your heart for the next child.”

So, we’re grieving…and preparing. God has a plan and he knows what’s coming next, and that’s what we’re trusting.

The first thing that popped in my head was “man she has a huge reward coming her way when she gets to heaven”. I imagined her walking into the pearly gates and God saying “Well done. Here’s is your reward.” And then points to a spread that would make Bill Gates’ house look like a doghouse.

I know a lot of people who say, “hey I just want to get IN, I don’t care if they put me in a tool shed, at least I’ll be there.” Ok, I guess. But how many of us in life live to “just stay alive”? Where’s the motivation for “more”? And not being greedy, but think about it. The God of the universe who created you and me has rewards for us. I don’t think God’s sitting up there with iPads to pass out, he’s got something special up his sleeve. Me, well, I don’t want to miss out on ANYTHING God has to offer.

I’ve pretty much given up in my faith in man.

I’ve seen, and been apart of, stories where man has failed people, including myself.

I don’t know.

Maybe I expect too much from people.

Maybe I think people should and will do the right thing when faced with a situation.

Maybe I hope they will.

Maybe my hope is stupid.

One example is the situation in Haiti.

Yes it is devastating. Yes it is a tragedy. And yes we need to help.

But I’m tired of people saying “Man, I need to get to Haiti…to help.”

Sure that’s a noble cause. You should be proud of yourself for wanting to help.

But…

What about your neighbor next door?

What about your coworker?

What about that family in your church?

What about that guy you drive by who’s holding a sign at an intersection?

So often we miss what’s in front of us cause we so focused on what’s out of sight.

We’re squinting to see what’s a mile away when there is a need right at the tip of our nose.

Dang it.

This weekend I took our 5 year old to see How to Tame A Dragon.

I’ll admit I wanted to see the movie with or without him.

Yeah, I’m a kid.

The movie is about a viking boy who wants to kill dragons, like his pops. Thing is the boy is a tiny, awkward, scared young boy who shouldn’t be any where near dragons.

Hiccup (the boy) befriends Toothless (the dragon) early in the movie and by getting to know this dragon he realizes what makes the dragon tick. What calms him down. What puts him to sleep. You get the idea.

This movie made me think about my approach with the kids I see each week at the Juvenile Detention Facility.

My strategy has always been to learn what makes them tick and play to their strengths.

I’ve realized these kids, above all else, want to be heard. They want to speak. They want someone to listen.

To listen and to care.

I find the best nights in the facility are the nights where I say the least (go figure). I think, for the most part, people can sometimes solve their problems by speaking them out loud.

I also think speaking their problems out loud helps takes the burden off their shoulders a bit. To speak out loud something that they’ve felt in their mind. But speaking it makes it real, or at least helps us to hear it for ourselves.

I’m realizing this is true for most people, including myself.

I sometimes wonder what church would be like if the congregation did most the talking.

I wonder.

Wow.

That is why I do this. For that question. For that attitude.

If the Mike of 15 years ago would of been asked that I would of said “say this prayer and BOOM you will be a changed man.”

But, I’m not convinced saying that prayer is all it takes.

I think following Jesus is a lifestyle, an attitude, a commitment, a 180 degree turn from sin.

The answer I gave to this man that night was different. I gave him some versus to look up. I encouraged him to talk to God in his cell that night. To ask Him for wisdom, for guidance. Read the Bible, and write down any questions that may come up. And we’ll work through those together. And last of all if you want to give your life to Christ, well, give your life to Christ.

I’m interested to see what God does with this man. I think he’s ready. I think the Holy Spirit is ready to move into this man’s heart.

I’m praying for this man.

And I ask for you too.

After reading that question I set the book down and reviewed my life and I admit the answer was “no, or I don’t think”.

I mean there are a lot of things that I rely on God for but I’m not sure if there was anything I actually said “I can’t do this on my own and need your help Lord.”

And I don’t want this to seem like I don’t rely on God for anything. I know he leads my life but I was just stumped trying to figure this question out. It may help if you understood how I interpreted the question. “Mike, is there anything in your life your doing that you couldn’t do on your own?”

I don’t know.

In 2009 Lisa and I stepped out and did something that required faith. And I’ll be honest it has been rough, real rough. In those valleys we’ve been going through are when we surrender (or need to surrender) it to God. Easier said than done, right?

I struggle with that. With the “surrender” part. I like to call the shots, but I’m realizing there are certain things that I just need to trust in God on, and that scares me.

A popular quoted Bible verse is John 16:33. We love to quote the part “In this world you will have trouble.” But sometimes we forget to add the next sentence “But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

And I read the “take heart” as “fear not”.

I know there are going to be more rough patches ahead. How rough? I don’t know. But, I’m relying on God for those. So, Lord, please help me recognize when I need you and help me surrender my life over to you.

So, your turn, is there anything in YOUR life that requires faith?

He talked about decision making and gave this illustration from one of the men in his church. I’ve added my own flavor to it.

This is what the typical decision making graph looks like:

The one flaw in that graph is that it assumes it’s equally as easy to make a good decision as it is a bad one.

In reality here’s what most decision graphs look like:

And then when we make the bad decision (cause it’s easier to slide down a hill than it is to climb stairs) we realize it and take a look at the path back to the good decision.

We not only have to stop the momentum of our bad decision but we have to climb back up the slide and still go through the hard work of climbing the steps up.

Hmmmm, make sense?

“The Book Of Eli” Movie Promo from Cooke Pictures on Vimeo.